I Don’t Believe in Valentine’s Day.
Okay, before you get all upset with me, let me say that I love any day that celebrates love and the people you love–I am a romance author after all. What I don’t love is a Hallmark Holiday where I’m supposed to go out and spend a ridiculous amount of money on stuff that’s overpriced for this one day. It’s like the marketing world is guilting me into plumping up their bottom line, and it takes all the fun and romance out of the day for me.
That doesn’t mean I believe you shouldn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day. Hell, I think you should celebrate it any and every day of the year. But I try to celebrate in a way that’s meaningful, memorable, and free. For many, it also helps if the ideas don’t require any special cooking or artistic skills. That said…
1) Leave love notes in random places. Jot one line notes on small pieces of paper, even just “I Love You” or “You are amazing”, will do fine. Then stash them on or under your lover’s pillow, in their coffee mug, in their bag or briefcase, on the tv remote, in the medicine cabinet. Doesn’t matter where, what matters is that you hide a few in surprising spots for them to find.
2) Fill a jar with reasons why you love them. Extra points on this one for using colored construction paper, but really any kind of paper cut into small strips will do. You can ask them to read them all in one sitting, or save them for anytime they need a pick-me-up.
3) Have a picnic. If you live somewhere with nice weather, an outdoor picnic dinner is perfect. If you’re like me, and it’s too damn cold out where you live, have a picnic on your living room or bedroom floor.
4) Give personal coupons. My hubby was thrilled the year I gave him a set of coupons for things he enjoys, like a massage, a quickie, a round of laundry washing, a bj, etc. Be sure to put an expiration date on them so they actually get used.
5) Create a lovers game. Grab some paper, a pen, and a timer. Now write down various sexy things you might do to each other, and give each one a time limit. So, you might write: “Kiss with tongue for thirty seconds.” Or, “Nuzzle my neck for 20 seconds.” Or, “Massage my shoulders for one minute.” These can be as wild as you like. The key is, for the period of the game, the active player can only take that one action, and must take that action for the entire time noted. The other person must do nothing but enjoy it. Chances are you’ll only make it through about five turns before you give up and get busy, but it’ll be the best five turns in a game in your life.
Bonus Idea: Make time for getting jiggy. If your sex life tends to be intermittent, rushed, or always interrupted by little ones, this is a very thoughtful gift. Ideally make it special and different. Light candles in the bedroom. Create a scavenger hunt of clues leading your lover up to where you’re waiting, naked (or in their favorite sexy outfit). Run a hot bath and take it together. Start with a massage. Read excerpts from your favorite steamy romance novel. However, if you’re lives are super busy and you and your SO are like two ships passing in the night, just setting aside an hour of alone time might be special enough.
Got more fun, free, romantic ideas for celebrating Valentine’s Day? Please share them below.
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I have been saying this for years.
Relationships aren’t supposed to suck and we need to quit normalizing this kind of disrespect and dysfunction.
We HAVE to stop normalizing the "hating your spouse" narrative. If my partner ever called me a ball and chain he'd be sleeping on the balcony. Why would you make the choice to marry someone, only to complain about being married to them? Get a damn divorce. What a weird culture.
Just to recap: Congress members who get $174k a year in publicly-funded pay, publicly-funded health care, publicly-funded pensions, publicly-funded travel, and unlimited publicly-funded vacation and sick time think $300 a week for unemployment is "too socialist."
In the For the People Act hearing, Sen Roy Blunt felt good samaritans giving water to voters could buy off votes.
You know you’re fucked when you’re worried that water will flip your voters.
“I would like to be the air that inhabits you for a moment only. I would like to be that unnoticed and that necessary.”
― Margaret Atwood